1) Diet shame. I am laboring under the delusion that if I don't tell people I'm on a diet, shh, they won't notice how fat I am! God forbid anyone I know IRL should happen across this blog and find out the secret truth of just how much I weigh (known only to my Obstetrician and my husband, and he only got it after much resistance on my part). I know this is ridiculous. I know I look as fat as I am but I can't get it out of my head that people would be shocked at my weight. I do think this is true though -- I'm not an apple shape and don't have the body usually associated with that, plus I only have like an extra half chin, which is pretty darn good for 5'4" and nearly 300 lbs. I seriously have a butt the size of a watermelon though. It's not pretty. Maybe someday when I am svelter I will get over this and be proud of my accomplishment rather than ashamed by my lack thereof. But right now I prefer to hide behind my anonymity.
2) I'm skeered of the big bad internet. Actually, this isn't going to go away. I might eventually post blurred out face shots, but I do worry about the lack of anonymity. And I don't want stalkers.
So in the meantime, here's an approximation thanks to My Virtual Model.
Me at goal vs. Me now. (I think that the Me now is probably pretty accurate, without stretchmarks, nursing boobs or saggy baby belly skin, but I don't know how accurate it can be given that it thinks I will look exactly the same 50 lbs lighter. Hmm)
0 comments:
Post a Comment